Ashraf's Place: My reflections, refractions and transmissions

Siesta

2010-09-07T14:51:00.001+08:00

The man from the Earth

2010-07-27T13:03:00.002+08:00

Perfect backdrop

2009-08-03T14:28:00.002+08:00

It pays to be at the right place, at the right time and with the right equipments. In this case it happens to be East coast park, Singapore's flag day rehearsal and my camera, in the order.

Two of my friends (guess who ?) were lucky to get this backdrop.

Picturesque

2009-08-01T01:27:00.005+08:00

This is what a friend of mine (Vikas) did to my last poem with his beautiful photography. I loved it, and am hoping to collaborate with him further...may be a picturesque book :-)

Dilemma

2009-06-30T17:28:00.004+08:00

Keeping the faith in light
When the fickle candle flame
Is facing a wind fight

Confrontation is a must
Even in the sinister darkness
Whether for love or for lust

Keep up the spirit
Acknowledge the rejection
As it is the writ

Build the space
Leave some room
All for joy, some for gloom

A face off with the impending God
Without a sketch
Arguably the oddest of odd

Eventually,
The candle will light up
The gloomy space
Whether for love or for lust
The face off will be destroying
Not you, but the dilemma

A vicious dead end

2009-06-18T16:58:00.001+08:00

She was adopted
Never met her biological parents; they were dead; No siblings; No known relatives
Her adopted parents never hid this from her
She was raised like one of their own
Luck was on her side, and she found the ideal match
A very loving husband
A soul mate
Now she craved for a child
Somebody who has her genes
Somebody who can look like her
Another living person in this whole universe who shares a biological similarity
Luck was not on her side this time
She was sterile
A complete barren

World through my lens

2009-04-15T21:09:00.005+08:00

I have been using my NIKON D40 quite often nowadays. I am posting the pictures on PICASA. Please visit if you may. The link is in my blog by the name:World through my lens

Don't forget to tell me which is your favorite picture and why!!

Demoiselle

2009-04-07T01:41:00.004+08:00

What's your favorite brand?

2009-03-31T14:32:00.002+08:00

An online survey was conducted to find out the most liked Singaporean brand. Here is the list of 10 brands that made it to the top.

1. Colgate
2. Google
3. Starhub
4. NTUC Fairprice
5. Sony
6. SingTel
7. Yahoo
8. Straits Times
9. 7-Eleven
10. Nippon Paint

I wonder what would be your personal list?

Chinese heritage centre at NTU

2009-03-29T01:00:00.002+08:00

Chinese heritage centre is the National Monument built in 1953 near Yunnan Garden at NTU-Singapore. My NIKON moment of this beautiful piece of architecture....say cheese :-)

Half rainbow and Nikon D40

2009-03-28T16:33:00.004+08:00

I was suggested by some friends, who are so called professional photographers, that to learn photography you need to rise above a point and shoot camera. I bought an SLR camera (Nikon D40...a beginners camera) one year back. But, it is now that I am getting hold of it...i mean physical hold..I somehow manage to keep it away and hence i am still an amateur. Anyway enjoy this picture of rainbow.

Eternal questions

2009-03-20T17:29:00.001+08:00

Who created the creation?
Did it happen on its own?
Or, was there a creator?
Is he the one unknown?

Who is superior?
The creator or the creation
Who is to be loved?
The creator or the creation?
Who is to be worshipped?
The creator or the creation?

Does God reside in his creation?
Can he?
Should he?
Are they distinguishable?
Or they are the one?

Is there a paradise?
Is there a hell?
Is there a soul?
Is there a free will?

What is a virtue?
What is a sin?
Are we responsible
For thoughts within?

What is the purpose?
What is the need?
Are we the only one
Of his favorite creed?

How will it all end?
What is the right way?
Who will be the Messiah
To save on the Judgment day?

Random-thoughts 4

2009-03-13T22:20:00.003+08:00

I wonder why
People like to see new places
I want to revisit old ones
To feel nostalgic
To feel sad
To feel neglected

I wonder why
People like to make new friends
I want to revisit my enemies
To convert them
To befriend them
To take my revenge

I wonder why
People like to move
I want to be stagnant
To feel safe
To feel composed
To feel rotten

I wonder why
People like to be loved
I want to be hated
To feel the purest of emotion
To relive myself of expectations
Just be hated

I wonder why
People like to know
I want to be ignorant
To feel bliss
To feel arrogance
Just be dumb

I wonder why
People like colours
I want to be colorless
To feel unadulterated
To feel natural
Just be invisible

I wonder why
People like to live
I want my death
To feel nothing
To feel nothing
To complete my last strand of life’s experience

Flight of fantasy

2009-01-31T22:12:00.004+08:00

You are here
After ages

Tons of history
Plenty of memories
Very few regrets

I waited
Infinitely long
With endless glances at the door
Not knowing the purpose

Truth is, I am lost

You ask for the name
I ask for it too
You ask for the cause
I don’t even know my loss

You ask for more
I tell my dreams

You understand
Dreams are all I got
Not even memories
Not even history
And no regrets

You suddenly realize
I starved
Beyond my capacity
Killing my hunger forever

But I contest
I am alive
With a hint of ambrosia

You feel the indifference
I notice the guilt
And the beauty, like a halo
Decorating my surrounding
But intangible

And here it comes
The awakening call

It was a dream
Multiple dreams
Reality disorder

One of my flights of fantasy!

Sea fever

2009-01-28T14:53:00.004+08:00

Chinese new year brought a long weekend. Gave me an opportunity to visit one of the island (Pulao Ubin) in Singapore. The sea got me nostalgic, and the fever gripped me....SEA FEVER as they call...Reminded me of a poem I read during my school days

Sea Fever by John Masefield

I must down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by,
And the wheel's kick, and the wind's song and the white sail's shaking,
And a gray mist on the sea's face, and a grey dawn breaking.
I must down to the seas again, for the call of the of the running tide
Is a wild call and a clear call which may not be denied.
And all I ask is a windy day with white clouds flying,
And flung spray and blown spume, and the seagulls crying.
I must down to the seas again, to the vagrant gypsy life,
To the gull's way, and the whale's way, where the wind's like a whetted knife.
And all I ask is a merry yarn from a laughing fellow rover,
And a quite sleep and a sweet dream when the long trick's over.

Yes we can

2009-01-21T11:45:00.002+08:00

And here is world's most anticipated event. America's 44th president, Barack Hussein Obama, who by the way shares his middle name with deceased former Iraqi president, Saddam Hussein, takes the oath.

I call it American Democracy (in a good way).

Random thoughts 3

2009-01-18T00:07:00.002+08:00

These are some random thoughts...

Changes, memories, regrets, ecstasies
My life is full of fantasies

Observation, poetry, imagination, verses
My life is full of blushes

Yes, no, yes, no, may be not
My life is a fuzzy plot

Family, friends, enemies, strangers
My life is species endanger

Moonlight, star, dawn and breeze
My life gets lighten with all of these

Books, nooks, tea and toast
My life makes out the most of most

Confusion, frustration, anger, achievement
I do not resent, I do not consent

Denial, acceptance, amazement, surrender
I always doubt, I always wonder

India in 2008

2008-12-31T16:22:00.002+08:00

Top 10 events in 2008 from an Indian point of view (In chronological order)

1. A general election is held in Pakistan. Precursor to Musharraf’s downfall from the presidency.

2. India sets a world record by sending 10 satellites into orbit in a single launch.

3. United Progressive Alliance led government survives a crucial no-confidence vote based on disagreements between Indian National Congress and Left Front over the Indo-US nuclear deal.

4. A series of seven bomb blasts rock Jaipur, Bangalore, Ahmedabad, and Delhi.

5. Olympics take place in Beijing, China. India wins it first individual gold.

6. Lehman Brothers filed for bankruptcy protection. Precursor of global economic recession.

7. ISRO successfully launches Chandrayaan-1 spacecraft on a lunar exploration mission

8. Barack Obama is elected the 44th President of the United States, and becomes the first African-American President-elect

9. A series of terrorist attacks in Mumbai. Taj-Oberoi attacked.

10. Israel initiates a series of air strikes against the Gaza Strip

12 hours of Gajini

2008-12-26T23:24:00.001+08:00

The plan was fool proof.
Buy the movie ticket 2-3 hours before the show
Get good seats
Hang around for an hour or so
Have dinner at one of the Indian restaurant
Walk back to the theater
Enjoy Ghajini
By the time movie ends, be ready to celebrate Christmas Eve with fireworks and foam holi.
Awesome! Isn’t it?
This was our idea of an awesome night. We, a bunch of Indian researchers (some working, some hardly working and some studying god-knows-what…but none a pub loyalist and drinker as is the trend among Indians in Singapore)

The only problem with my plans is, they never work. My friends know it, they always disapprove it, they agree to it finally, they curse me in the end, and then they forget about it to get into the trouble all over again.

So, we starter at 4:30 pm…office was half day due to Christmas Eve… The show we targeted was 8:45 pm. We reached the theatre at 5: 45 pm. Bought tickets. Planned to go Little India for food... It takes 30 minutes or so walking… walking will make us hungry suggested somebody…Met another friend there. Forced him to give us a treat for no apparent reasons…We enjoy taking treats like that. Our treats come as surprise, at least to the host. Having stuffed our self with Indian delicacies, we leveled things up with an Indian masala tea.

Walked back to the theater. Walking is good suggested somebody again. It helps to digest any Indian food.

The theater was crowed as expected. The show was houseful. There were lots of desis flaunting their Indian ness. It’s a good place to check out new desi gals in the town. Finally, we manage to squeeze in to the theater, and found out our respective seats. We do not like to miss our initial dose of trailers which they show during the start of the movie. It was Billo Barbar this time. And then came a heavily built guy with his family, to shatter our dream.

Apparently he wanted to sit on out seat. I, being the perpetuator of the plan, was left to handle the situation. I got up like Gajini’s Aamir (I realized this later) only to be beaten by the Gajini himself (not literally). How could two groups have the same seat numbers for the same movie for the same show? They cannot. We had been given the last show ticket by some mistake. By the time I decided to leave the theater, my friends already had.

I walked out of the theater to meet the lady who sold us the ticket. She denied. We persisted. She denied some more. We made a scene. Manger intervened. She accepted her fault. Manager agreed to give us the next show ticket, which was at 12:15 am. What will we do till then, and we will miss our Christmas Eve fun too if we go for this show. The manager solved our first problem. He offered us Rab ne bana di jodi for free. What more an Indian love other than a Bollywood movie? A free bollywood movie show.

We agreed.
Watched both the movies.
Came back to our respective abode by 4:30 am.

After 12 hours of Gajini
Still feeling sleepy. Waiting for the next day
To be abused by my friends in suffering.
But I am sure they will forget about this mishap and will again agree to be part of my New Year plan.

Life's lessons by Lincoln and Kipling

2008-12-16T16:12:00.005+08:00

I find a striking similarity between one of my favorite poem (If by Rudyard Kipling) and the letter written by Abraham Lincoln to the Headmaster of the school in which his son was studying. Both are deeply motivating and draws the contrast in life. Have a look and appreciate if you may.

If by Rudyard Kiping
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

A letter written by Abraham Lincoln
"He will have to learn, I know, that all men are not just and are not true. But teach him if you can, the wonder of books.. but also give him quiet time to ponder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun and flowers on a green hillside.

In school, teach him it is far more honorable to fall than to cheat.....

Teach to have faith in his own ideas, even if everyone tells him he is wrong.

Teach him to be gentle with gentle people and tough with the tough.

Try to give my son the strength not to follow the crowd when everyone getting on the bandwagon...

Teach him to listen to all men; but teach him also to filter all he hears on a screen of truth, and take only the good that comes through.

Teach him, if you can, how to laugh when he is sad... Teach him there is no shame in tears.

Teach him to scoff at cynics and to be beware of too much sweetness.. Teach him to sell his brawn and brain to highest bidders, but never to put a price on his heart and soul. Teach him to close his ears to a howling mob.. and stand and fight if thinks he is right.

Treat him gently, but do not cuddle him, because only the test of fire makes fine steel. Let him have the courage to be impatient.. Let him have the patience to be brave. Teach him always to have sublime faith in himself, because then he will have faith in humankind.

This is a big order, but see what you can do. . He is such a fine little fellow my son!"

Would you die for me?

2008-12-05T18:31:00.002+08:00

Would you die for me?
Asked a friend
May be...would you?

Would you die for me?
Asked a muse to her creator
A pause…I guess so

Would you die for me?
Asked a beloved to her lover
Yes of course. Darling, what about you?

Would you die for me?
Asked a prophet to his follower
If that is your wish

Would you die for me?
Asked a child to his mother
Silence…and she cried

Nano writing

2008-11-27T14:55:00.004+08:00

A picture of what I do in my free time. Those who are wondering , "whats the big deal ?", do see the scale bar.

By the way, this is not my best result.

Life till 20s

2008-11-18T18:07:00.002+08:00

Life is a journey full of dealings
Some cheerful and some not-so-appealing

First ten years need devotion of a mother
“An unforgettable deed” is what I declare
Next ten years runs with dad’s money
Adding spice in life is friends’ company

Now you are in twenties
You need to find a way in life
It could be a dream
It could be a profession
Or a fortunate turn of dice

And the journey continues...

Note: Since I am still in my twenties (ok ok late twenties) I won’t comment on the decades I haven’t experienced :-)

Halloween in Singapore

2008-11-02T13:58:00.005+08:00

Halloween is celebrated on 31st October. I didn't know that. I used to think it is an American phenomenon. I never suspected that Singaporeans too indulge in this fun festival.

By accident I happen to be at Clark Quay to witness and be part of the fun event. I went with a friend to do some night photography and end up enjoying Halloween.

Here are some snaps:

Clark Quay in reflection

It's me

Bungee jumping towers

Hungry kya ?

Job vs. higher studies

2008-10-29T13:44:00.001+08:00

Random thoughts 2

2008-10-20T15:01:00.000+08:00

I happen to feel an alien emotion
Something I never experienced before
I wonder about the veracity of my senses
Whether this emotion be felt or left ignored

Kalam at NTU

2008-08-26T23:48:00.005+08:00

Former Indian president and missile man APJ Abdul Kalam was here at NTU-Singapore, to be conferred an honorary doctorate in Engineering. Majority of Indian students, research staff (including me) and faculty was here to welcome him, along with the Singapore president, and other dignitaries. This was his second visit to NTU. He first visited NTU in the year 2006 during his presidency tenure.

This was my first live visual of him...being in research i always wanted to see him live... I missed my first chance by whiskers during his IISc visit and also his earlier visit to NTU.

His speech was surprising boring, and not at all according to his old charismatic self. However, he will definitely be the most student friendly president ever. And we love him for that.

For trivia lovers: I got my NTU degree earlier than him, of course at the same auditorium...u can revisit my convocation post for verification.

Life is mathematics

2008-08-14T18:11:00.002+08:00

Dude, what are you looking for
In this unknown space?
Your data point doesn’t cross
These XYZ coordinates

Your equation doesn’t have
An absolute solution
You may have to work your way
Through numerical intuitions

Since you barged into this
Different set of reference
You may sometime be called
An irrational nuisance

But then irrationality will make you
A number very unique
For some integers you will still be
An idea in Latin or Greek

Whatever it is you are
Wherever you belong to in the… NUMBER LINE
You will be a part of mathematical world
And you will always be … DEFINED

Random thoughts 1

2008-08-13T01:01:00.001+08:00

Treasure of moments has been lost in valueless translation
Overwhelming struggle is washed away by comforting cowardice
Feeling of dependence has caught reassuring indifference
Thoughtfulness of reason is murdered by adamant whim

I am no more a sinner…I am no more a saint

My poetic inspiration (Repost)

2008-08-03T01:57:00.000+08:00

Never, ever I saw such a splendor
That has lead me to the way of renunciation
A denial of any magic that is greater
Than the one I experienced

Never, ever I heard such a thunder
That has lead me to the way of silence
A denial of any musical that is more captivating
Than the heavenly orchestra

Never, ever I felt such an ecstasy
That has lead me to total numbness
A denial of any sensation that is classified
In terms of joy and sorrow

Never, ever I tasted such ambrosia
That has lead me to total replete
A denial of any assortment of flavor
That is superior to heavenly nectar

Never, ever I fell for a beauty
That has lead me to write these verses
A denial of any existence of rhyme
That surpasses praises of her glory

Convocation

2008-07-26T14:49:00.006+08:00

Receiving the degree

Finally graduated

With my Guru

Goodbye Vikas

2008-07-10T23:07:00.002+08:00

Vikas has been a significant part of our Singapore research gang. Today he is leaving Singapore for Holland, to pursue his European dream. We will miss him for the value addition he used to bring to the group, especially during our marathon tea time discussions, and otherwise.

Being a poet I couldn’t help myself, but to write a poem about him and his character. However, you are not suppose to take it too seriously.

A dreamer by birth, an explorer by choice
He is a friend in deed who always rejoice

He is a lazy bum, he is a stubborn lad
But he makes award winning websites, and his id is vikas.med

He likes photography with his semi pro SLR
He fantasizes Eurotrip and wants to journey that far

He talks like a master on topics of his expertise
But behaves like an adolescent when the subject is otherwise

He likes exploring places, as he likes looking for bus-routes
He is sometimes very restless; his only not-so-good attribute

Like all crazy researcher, he is gonna die an academic death
If that was not enough, he likes reading Vikram Seth

To have him as a friend is an honour filled with fun
To lose him over something would a damage never undone

Note: I have made a format to write poetry about friends and others, by asking them their 8 characteristics. In fact I am planning to develop a software program that will generate poems for anyone you wish, once you tell it the 8 main characteristics about that person. Very convenient. Isn’t it?

Dying poet

2008-07-03T21:43:00.006+08:00

The tale of a petulant failure
Is dying poet’s way of expression
He wants to punish the entire existence
His only thought in extinction

His heart may have imagined the heaven
With the only existing particle
But now he could not even sense
A single poetic recital

He is asking for the arrival
Of flower, of fountain, of rain
Still he gets soaked in his own
Sweat, blood and pain

He may, or he may not, is the only question
He ponders, though the answer is known
Never again could he get inspired
By his thoughts, his love, his moans

Celebrating 1000

2008-07-01T22:43:00.004+08:00

I am celebrating 1000 visits to my blog which came into being not so long ago. Here is the stat:

1000 Visits
202 Absolute Unique Visitors
2887 Pageviews
2.89 Average Pageviews
08:04 Average Time on Site
25 Countries Visited
86 Cities Visited

THANK YOU ALL

Guess the caption II

2008-07-01T21:32:00.003+08:00

*Note the scale bar ;-)

Mood swings

2008-06-26T22:45:00.001+08:00

My heart is sad because of you
My eyes are wet because of you
My nights are sleepless because of you
My dreams are lifeless because of you
Ah...
My heart learnt sadness
Because of the happiness in you
My eyes went wet
Because of the delight in you
I had sleepless nights
But I saw the moonlight
My dreams went dead
But I experienced the fantasy flight
Still...
Why don’t you let me live or die?
Why don’t you let me laugh or cry?
Why don’t you let me feel or numb?
Why don’t you let me stand or plunge?
Sigh...
I learnt to live though I want to die
I learnt to laugh though I want to cry
I felt numb, but I could sense
I fell, but I stood once

A mother

2008-06-25T23:55:00.002+08:00

What is MEMS ?

2008-06-23T17:12:00.005+08:00

For all those who are wondering about what we do and why we do...this is an interesting article to start with:

http://www.semiconductor.net/article/CA6571814.html?nid=3572

My hands at photography

2008-06-21T11:04:00.011+08:00

Crazy five

Wall painting

THE TREE

Jurassic Park

Sand Man

Vineet's love

2008-06-17T21:21:00.003+08:00

This one is from Vineet, a researcher, blogger and friend. He is the same guy who motivated me to start a blog. This is what he has to say on 'love'. I guess his maiden venture to poetry.

Love grows with distance,
full blown on return.
Love surges with resistance,
explodes when set free.
To pain, when separated, is Love
To pain, till united, is True Love
Love, complex as it may be,
people yearn for a bit of it, even the Gods.
Love given, is the virtue of the giver.
Love received, is the greatest of all gifts.
Love speaks, not what you love to hear,
instead, what you need to hear.
The world will reach its zenith,
Because Love gets the best in you.
Love is blind to the ills of your nature,
Because it sees only the best of you,
Like the starving dog watching his master's home.
To lend a hand, to the least among you,
is nothing, but Love.
To see heaven in a wild flower, sang the bard,
Yes, that is Love.

Have a dream

2008-06-14T15:14:00.004+08:00

Trying to chase someone’s dream
Devours most of our time
It looks futile when it’s not even sure
What is real and what is mime

For time may never come back,
At least in our acknowledged dimensions
But dreams if not realized returns
Like nightmares in haunted mansions

A dream’s purpose loses its value
If it not pursued by the original conception
It is like a borrowed success
Which is the biggest of deception

A true dream is different from the dream
That is not dreamt by the dreamer
It’s like a destination reached
By a different traveler

An idea of dream may not be
Enough to claim a fortune infinite
But an idea of dream is enough
To take pleasure in tiring days and sleepless nights

So, I plead to have a dream of yours
When it may be the most futile thought
Because a dreamy eyes and not its sight
Creates the difference between paradise and paradise lost

I

2008-06-11T17:33:00.003+08:00

(Pleasure)
I enjoy the party only if it’s few
And otherwise too
I drink the coffee only if it’s brew
And otherwise too

(Beauty)
I see the sky only if it’s blue
And otherwise too
I feel the drops only if it’s dew
And otherwise too

(Philosophy)
I like the appreciation only if it’s true
And otherwise too
I imagine the dreams only to pursue
And otherwise too

(Emotion)
I miss my friends after they adieu
And otherwise too
I enjoy the company only if it’s you
And nobody new

A god in my own universe

2008-06-07T17:52:00.004+08:00

It is 1:43 am and I am still awake
It’s completely dark
Except for the light coming from my laptop screen

Thinking of ideas to write poetry
I imagine my ceiling as the sky
And the light coming from laptop screen
As my square shaped moon

My room itself as the universe

I try hard to see other objects in my imagined space
I can see my nokia handphone lying
On the stool as my artificial satellite
Connecting me to otherwise isolated space

Along with it are my glasses
Acting as Mars
Giving me a perspective of the horizon
And the air conditioner as Venus
Providing me fresh breath of air

I can also see the piles of novels
I bought from India
They represent the surrounding planets
First among the lot is “five point someone” which is still unread
It is Pluto which has lost it status of being planet
On the top is thick “Atlas Shrugged” which I am currently reading
Is my Earth

The table clock is shining
Because of fluorescence numbers engraved
Showing me the status of time
It is my sun

I am also playing some old songs
For inspiration
Music acts as the background radiation
Coming from some distant galaxy
Giving me a hint of friendly neighbor

A big black colored table is holding all my paraphernalia
It is my black hole

And then there is a creator too
The one who is imagining all the creation
And putting it into words
It is me
A god in my own universe

Day and night

2008-06-06T14:39:00.004+08:00

When I get up in the morning, my first thought is about you. Engrossed in your thoughts I somehow persuade myself to go to work. After finishing the usual morning stuff and 40 min. later, I get out of my apartment hoping to see you today.

To reach my work place I need to catch a bus. Rushing for the bus, I hope to discover you on board. Maybe, sitting on a corner seat. I know you are sometimes found on buses. But I could never find you there. Being an optimist, I board the crowded bus. It takes 10 min. of waiting and equal min. of traveling to reach my intended stop.

Before I enter my lab and log on to my work station, I stop for a quick toast and tea in the new Broadway canteen. The aunty who makes toasts there now knows me pretty well. I can sense the acknowledgment in her friendly smile. But I still hope to see a glimpse of yours. It takes me around 15 min. to finish my breakfast. Sitting in one of the corner seat, I keep staring the entry door. You never come. You almost never come.

You are aware of my longing for you, but you don’t like the tea. I know that you know and you know that I know.

When I reach my lab, I anticipate seeing you there too. Your presence is impossible. Both of us are fully conscious of this fact. I try to distance my self from your idea during my working hours, hoping that the day has just begun and we will have ample opportunity to stumble upon each other.

Tick tick tick…150 min. later

We are nearing the lunch time, and still no visit from you.

I go out for lunch with my friends. They know how much I need you. They banter around me by taking your name every now and then. They tempt me. I get tempted. Although I show my fake anger with a dry smile and angry looking eyes, which actually strengthens their belief that I enjoy all this. They are right. They are always right.

We take almost 45 min. to stuff ourselves with the pseudo Indian food. Once we are done, we return to our respective labs. My yearning for you is the strongest after lunch period. Those lonely 2 to 3 hours are unbearable. But I somehow control myself and get engrossed in my work.

Evening tea too companies a bunch of friend. We tend to discuss issues pertaining to research, politics, sports, and everything that comes under the roof of this 13 billions years old universe. Even though the discussion is so entertaining and enriching, I still look at the canteen door, absorbed in your thoughts. Hoping to see you making an entry into my eyes. But I am unsuccessful again. You never come.

I go back to my lab, and try to work using my last reserve of positive energy of the day, which last for another one and a half hour. Back of my mind still has you.

Now the night has come, and we are ready for our last meal of the day. I haven’t seen you the whole day. This is my last hope. We choose a canteen based on the majority of vote and dominance of the force. But, my criterion is you. I want to go to the canteen where I can find you. I am defeated again.

The time after dinner till mid night is something I keep for my past undone work, chatting with friends, poetry and blogging. These are the 2 hours I miss you the least. You should not get offended because my least is more than the most of the most.

Now its almost mid night. I am ready to go back to my dwelling. On my way I am listening to recently synchronized songs on my ipod nano and still thinking about you. It takes me 30 min. to reach my block, take the lift, open the door, bath, and change to my bedtime outfit. Now I am almost on my bed and you still are to be seen no where near. I read a page or two of ‘Atlas Shrugged’ which I am trying to finish for the last 3 months. It’s a big book by the way.

Then suddenly you come, and be there for the rest of the night. It’s only you and me under the ceiling of my room which is conditioned for a temperature of 25 degree Celsius. We spend almost 7 hours together. You leave just at the moment I wake up, making me crave for you again…Again for the whole day.

Simile

2008-06-04T22:35:00.001+08:00

The smile that never came to lips
Is like the candle that never got lit

The desire that never got fulfilled
Is like the child that never felt thrilled

The innocence that got defiled
Is like the bride that never walked the aisle

The effort that never saw success
Is like the traveler that never found his address

The appetite that has never been fed
Is like the poem that has never been read

Habits...

2008-06-03T17:25:00.003+08:00

Another one from Ankur Khare

Robin Sharma (of the monk who sold his Ferrari fame), wrote “if you follow a thing/ habit for 21 days, it becomes a necessity and you need another 21 days of determination to get out of that necessity” . Not that I am a big fan of Robin Sharma or I have followed the tips he gave, but yes it reminded me of some Miss Lucy of DDLJ...who said… “Aadatein agar jaldi badli na jaayein to wo jarooratein ban jaati hai...”

Well, I went to a hospital yesterday and saw something strange. A person lying on the bed and staring on the blank TV screen and shouting in between something incomprehensible, then again keeping quiet. The doctor told me this abnormality will continue up to 11 pm or even till 12 pm. He will get out of it soon. Don’t worry. We have about 50 similar patients sitting here and doing this. Some of them even not eating anything in dinner and some continuously asking popcorns and pepsi. I asked what the disorder is. He told me it’s “Life after IPL”.

I had a good laugh and came back from the place. I have this married friend who has a 2 yr old kid with an ability to refresh your mind. I went to his place for a tea and found the couple fighting. The fight was about who will make the dinner tonight. I was surprised as they had a pakka arrangement for alternate day of sacrifice, each helping other with dishes and cutting onions and vegetables. What’s the fight now?

It seems they had gone into that betting culture that with each supporting a different team and whoever wins the bet will enjoy the next day dinner without anything to do. NO Match No Bet ...dare I say No Dinner. They seem to have forgotten the earlier set up. May be another 21 days. Or they need to find another topic of betting. Like who will read the news on aajtak today Deepak or Vinod. What will be the colour of the sari of Tulsi...Blue or Green...?

People seem to have caught these diseases. They have left the old saas bahu sickness and picked up these. I thought its only families which are getting affected. So I went to a bachelor friend of mine. He was too depressed to even talk. I for a moment thought that he is the most affected. He is missing the matches and the drama. He said “Hell with IPL , its over and now I am free ...for full duration I watched it and enjoyed , but now I have forgotten it and want to go back to my normal life and meet my girl , but she is in no mood..” . Well, I wanted to tell him that it’s a revenge she is taking on you for not taking her out for a month but decided against it and kept quiet.

Nothing seems to have replaced IPL as of now. Families are looking for some old serials but it just doesn’t seem to fit in. Pets got a good game of jumping on every boundary or six , don’t feel like jumping on close ups of 'Mihir' or 'Baa' face being shown three times in a row without any reason . Wives who were worried in the beginning of IPL that they may loose track of the story line after one month are least bothered about the story of the serials now. Though I can tell you nothing much would have changed in these stories. It might take an IPL of 80 teams and a league of 4 matches each to let the stories of these move ahead.

Well it has its effect. You can see groups in the office/work place/home being formed based on their teams. People calling others as DD member or DC or RR or CSK. Some of them have got this habit of sending message to others “DD or RR?? "...not even mentioning in the sms the obvious part of the question which team are you with. Some shouting (presumably singing) “dhol bajane aaye hum” or “korbo ladbo jeetbo re..” on any achievement or moment of success. People have already started enquiring about marriage organizers for arranging cheerleaders in baarat or ladies sangeet. A request for a dug out for barathis will not be totally unacceptable.

Research conferences arranging opening ceremony with a bollywood star/dancer/singer/ being arranged will not be totally out of place. After each presentation some dancers dancing and cheering the public scientists. Some of them might even go to SRK or PZ for funding their presentation to start a club culture promoting science. Each bidding for the best presenter and may be a prize money for a few billions for the coveted ones.

Welcome to the World After IPL.

Consciousness of an end

2008-06-01T13:25:00.004+08:00

When you feel something truly
It too will feel your presence
The reciprocity of action has a revelation
Far beyond the worldly intelligence

You will feel the pain of a sacrificial lamb
If you dare to look into its vulnerable eyes
The moment of extinction is distinctly visible
As though it is conveying its cries

You will feel the pain of a withering flower
If you dare to look into its declining beauty
The moment of extinction is distinctly visible
As though it is conveying its cries

You will feel the pain of a dilapidated monument
If you dare to look into its crumbing walls
The moment of extinction is distinctly visible
As though it is conveying its cries

You will feel the pain of a shredded book
If you dare to look into its fading words
The moment of extinction is distinctly visible
As though it is conveying its cries

You will feel the emotion
Only if you care to reciprocate the pain
The origin of which lies in the victim’s eyes
The eyes which may not be distinct like ours
But its perception goes far beneath

Awareness of existence,
Consciousness of an end
Are considered to be human emotion
But I believe in consciousness of the whole
Which encompasses all that has life, lifeless and beyond

What's in a name ?

2008-05-31T15:08:00.001+08:00

Ankur Khare, Bangalore

“What's in a name...” Wrote Shakespeare and wrote his name below it.

Names are a unique thing and you just seem to relate to a person by that name. Sometimes you even make a character sketch based on the name. At least I do and presume that others also do though the sketch may differ based on their personal experiences.

But names have been so confusing that it's about time I stop making a character sketch (CS) using a name. One of the names I used for my first CS was Ram. I had seen Ramayana like everyone else in my age group those days on television. That helped me make an image of the name. I always thought of people with name Ram as the one with characteristics of Lord Ram. Till one day one of the friends named Ram hit me with a missile stone and all my perceptions changed. I couldn't imagine myself being Ravana and the missle being a Brahmastra.

The moment you hear someone's name as Amitabh you imagine him to be a tall personality with a thundering voice and yet a polite person, until you meet Amitabh Singh of Chhatarpur who is 5 ft and has a feeble voice ala Sachin Tendulkar. That brings me to another CS. Sachin...A great cricketer. At least the person with this name should have something to do with cricket. But no, Sachin Gupta dint even know there are 6 balls in an over. The funnier part is I had made a CS of my name as well, till I met my namesake (nemesis) who spoilt my belief about the name Ankur.

The most ample opportunities I had for making a character sketch was for the name Rajneesh. Well I had a classmate, three college mates, and one office friend by this name. Not that I am telling anything new here but all of them were completely different from each other .Yet I have a CS even for this name. Next time I meet a sixth Rajneesh I will be ready with an image in my mind for that person as well. And I can tell you that image will do anything but resemble Acharya Rajneesh Osho. That's how our system works. Again I take the privilege of being a writer and making pretty much generalized statements and using the word ‘our’ systems.

I have this friend named Ashraf on whose blog I write all this crap. I presume those reading this would have an image or CS of him. So whenever I see any terrorist in the news with a name as Ashraful or Ashraf, I start looking for a researcher-cum-poet and a great friend in his eyes. Though I also sometimes wonder how many people search a terrorist in ‘our’ Ashraf's eyes. Ask the American embassy who rejected his visa. I, therefore, always tell him “Tera to Sirf Naam hi Kaafi Hai...”

My poetic inspiration

2008-05-28T22:31:00.003+08:00

The defining moment

2008-05-27T22:42:00.010+08:00

There is no easier way to make fun of yourself than to post something foolish in your blog. That is what I am going to do by posting this piece which I wrote couple of years back, and which happened even earlier.

The memory of this particular event is still fresh in my mind. The year was 1993. I was in seventh standard.

Back then I was this happy-go-lucky lad who would delay anything (including studies for exams) to the last minute. Although I wouldn’t claim I have changed my attitude much, but times were different then. I, usually, used to study only the last day for any exams. I know it’s not the kind of secret you would want to share with people at this stage of your life. People normally do this when they become successful, which by any standard I am not.

Anyway, I was under the impression that the physics exam was on the day next to the actual day (I realized that later), so I didn’t study anything, having a strong confidence in my night-out-before-examination strategy. I only knew the things that had been taught in the classroom, as I was a good listener even then...Just kidding.

On the examination morning, a certain twist of fate happened (that has forced me to believe in destiny sometime) and I saw some students going to the school (it helped to live near the school). It was enough to put me in doubt. I rechecked my time table and realized the blunder I have made in exam dates. I got frightened thinking I will definitely get failed. Only those who have experienced something similar can understand how I must have felt. However, I recollected myself, told about this to my parents ...they had a lot of faith in me that’s why they never checked my exam schedule…that was end of it... and studied whatever I could in those 30 min. or so, and gave the exam.

My father on his own level tried to persuade my physics teacher through his friend (who was friends to my physics teacher), knowing very well that it is very important for me to pass this exam if he wants to keep my morale high. He also knew that I wasn’t a bad student, but a little careless. I didn’t know what happened behind the curtains, but I managed to clear that exam (on my own as told by my physics teacher later) albeit with minimum passing marks.

But, I was very happy and relieved, and thanked that hidden power who got me up early in the morning and forced to go to my house’s rooftop and stare at the road going towards my school, and made me see students (in uniform) to put me in doubt about the exam date. The probability of this sequence of actions happening in my life is zero. Mathematically, I should have missed my physics exam.

In retrospect when I think about this incident I feel foolish, but also a tad bit of proud, having cleared “the physics exam” with only 30 min. of study. That was then. Later, when I really got to know studies, physics became fun.

Whenever I think about this incident, I get a feeling that this may well be the defining moment of my life. If I would have flunked that exam, I wouldn't be doing any research.

Alas! That didn't happen.

The way

2008-05-26T22:04:00.003+08:00

Prosperity o prosperity
Do not mock at my luck
I have always made a choice
In favor of my wandering spirit

It may have steered me to an existence
Full of unbridled anomalies
But I live with the vigor of a habitant
Who is supremely content

I do not trust prominence
An outcome of social existence
A reality based on strange collective tendencies
An eventuality which is non existent in higher dimension
Although it tends to show its face by its cruel deeds

So, I decided, not to make an alliance
With the deceitful enemy- the destiny
But only on one condition, which I know, is impossible
If it wants to accompany me
I need the entire life’s declaration

I know that time will change,
Not that I want it to
Circle of life will run through day and night
But I will be the way I should be
And you should be the way you want to be

An ode to father

2008-05-24T16:36:00.003+08:00

One relationship that is
Devoid of much attention
Is a complex relationship
Between father and son

Half of our creator
As we know is our father
But he doesn’t get the same glory
As his counterpart-the mother

Mother can exhibit openly
Their affection and love
But father has to maintain
His image of being tough

His love in no way
Is lesser or conditional
It’s just that his stature
Is conceived a bit traditional

He provides a safety net
For us to breed and prosper
He is the first one to understand
When our ideas are good or improper

He endows us with the whole river
When it’s just a glass of water we need
He is the first one to say an indifferent no
When it’s one of those life’s lesson he wants to teach

He may always lose
The ranking game with his complement
But let’s agree on one thing
He is best of all the elements

A letter to my readers and co-bloggers

2008-05-20T22:45:00.008+08:00

Dear readers and co-bloggers

It gives me great joy to inform you all that my blogging experience in the last month (which is also the first month of my active blogging) has been tremendously eventful. Although the number of comments were not record breaking, yet the number of visits were far more than expected. The blog has 1119 pagevists from 372 visitors (including 79 unique visits) from 37 cities across the five continents.

I hope that you guys will keep on visiting my blog, and would like to request for more participation and support in comment posting.

My heartfelt thanks to all of you.

Yours truly
Ashraf

Kangaroo NOT on the table

2008-05-19T22:57:00.006+08:00

My last post on kangaroos had me in trouble for showing kangaroos in bad taste (literally). The idea is to amend that mistake for good by posting this picture and avoiding any troble from PETA or Menaka Gandhi...Hoping that this picture is worth thousand words.

Note: The kangaroo in the last picture has strong reservation about being seen with me. I had no choice but to remove it.

Microlen part II - Classification

2008-05-18T15:57:00.006+08:00

Microlens, as discussed in my post “Microlens part I” is one of the most important elements in the field of microoptics. Based on the refraction or diffraction phenomena at the optical interface, it can be classified as refractive microlens or diffractive microlens. In refractive microlens, the light is manipulated by analog phase element of considerable thickness in relation with the optical wavelength. In diffractive microlens light is diffracted at the periodic microstructure of the element.

Fabrication techniques for diffractive microlens have a good control over process parameters, and produce microlenses with good reproducibility and uniformity, which is a difficult task in refractive microlens production. However, from a system point of view, refractive microlens offers several advantages such as: reduced wavelength sensitivity as compared to diffractive microlens (a necessity for broadband applications), possibility of realizing large numerical aperture, and high light efficiency.

Now there is another kind of microlens which is called Graded Index microlens, and is basically a different type of refractive microlens. Rather than being refracted at the surface profile, in GRIN lenses, the light is deflected by a refractive index gradient within the surface. This in general leads to superior aberration characteristics of GRIN microlenses than that of conventional refractive microlenses. However, the major drawback with these kinds of lenses lies in the difficulty in fabrication. The precise formation of pre-specified graded index profile requires a very complex technology. Based on the terminology of GRIN lenses, we can define refractive microlens with a varying surface profile as Graded Thickness Microlenses. The idea seems appropriate since grading of thickness is the most prominent feature here, and the reason for the functionality of these lenses. It also helps to draws an analogy with GRIN lenses.

Both the diffractive microlenses and the graded index microlens have particular benefits, and can be used for certain type of application. However, as a best compromise between simple manufacturing techniques, high speed, low cost and good quality of microlenses produced, gives graded thickness microlens an edge over other kind of microlenses.

Mourned celebrations

2008-05-17T00:15:00.001+08:00

Your glimpse is like an ephemeral
Gesture of indifferent weather
It surrounds, it caresses and then
Flees like a frothy feather

But I can feel your sweet fragrance
In time and space everywhere
My heart recites your thoughts
With an innocence of a child’s prayer

My beloved do not blame my faithfulness
When your are surrounded by cruel desolation
I have mourned your absence
Even in my overwhelming celebrations

I know that you are my only messiah,
And I am your supreme creation
I worship you knowing that someday
You will come for my absolute demolition

First among equals

2008-05-15T14:21:00.007+08:00

Found this interesting picture on the net. Looks like all the great scientists were born within a span of 30 to 40 years. I guess the title for first among equals should go to Einstein. But, who according you is the second most favourite scientist among these equals ?

Your thoughts

2008-05-10T00:05:00.002+08:00

I was alone and thinking clear
Then I thought about my lovely dear
Having your thoughts brought me joy
But, my thinking process was no more clear

I thought that I was your subject of affection
If you didn’t think then may be I wasn’t
It’s just the wishful thinking that I always do
Or it’s the truth you never tell, or you wouldn’t

Thinking aloud I screamed for illumination
I even thought your thoughts in absolute silence
I imagined you with all my senses
I lost my senses in your absence

Reaching this state I demand the truth
Challenge me with the battle I fought never
I lost everything for my ultimate alliance
So I decided to win you, or lose your thought forever

Who am I?

2008-05-09T18:27:00.002+08:00

I enjoy my pain
I cry my laughter
I die my birth
I live my slaughter

I plan my entry
I decide my departure
I am the one who lived in me
I am the one who abandoned it after

I am my own critic
I am my own opinion
I am my own journey
I am my own destination

I am my reassurance
I am my apprehension
I exist with the one
Who is beyond comprehension

Guess the caption I

2008-05-08T22:16:00.006+08:00

Whosoever identifies this picture and gives the best caption will win a dinner for one in River Walk Tandoor-Clark Quay, Singapore. Competition is open to all, and the winner can claim his/her price from me @ MMC-MAE, NTU.

Answer will only be accepted in the form of comments in my blog. I will be the only deciding factor for the competition. Based on the responses I will post more of my (work) pictures to further the game, and prizes.

Dinner can be claimed not more than 1 week later after the winner is announced, unless I agree to do so. Any doubts, discrepancy, controversy over the choice of winner will not be entertained, unless I agree to do so.

Microlens part I - Introduction

2008-05-06T14:17:00.007+08:00

Warning: It's a technical post

In my article, “what are POEMS, technically?” I discussed about the different emerging fields (some of them are already commercially viable) based on the miniaturization of the various mechanical, electronic and optical component, along with the changes in approach in terms of processes, techniques and materials. Albeit superficially we mange to get some idea about the vast (but very small) fields of MEMS, MOEMS and POEMS.

Today I will try to enlighten you about microlens, which can be considered as one of the most important components in the field of microoptics.

Starting with the definition: Simply speaking microlens is a lens whose geometrical size or aperture is less than 1 mm. So, most of the time when we say microlens, we mean lens which is small...smaller than the conventional lens. That’s that for the time being. I will introduce complexities in the definition later.

Having understood about the basic defining criteria for a lens to be known as microlens, let me throw some light on how it all started. I mean the background: Conventional lenses have been an area of interest for long. Even in the mid of 17th century, geniuses like Robert Hooke had already produced their own lenses. However, it was not until the arrival of fiber optics that brought with itself the trend of miniaturization for optical components. The important fabrication techniques, nevertheless, were still based on classical way of grinding and polishing. More recently (1970s), the development of IC fabrication techniques and its adaptation in the field of optics, has helped the idea of miniaturization to be realised, which in turn helped to generate optical components in the micrometer range.

The synergy of fiber optics with IC fabrication techniques, along with their potential applications, produced the basic thrust that lead to idea of producing smaller dimension optical components, (microlens being most important of them).

Which team are you with ?

2008-05-03T18:00:00.008+08:00

Written by Ankur Khare, Bangalore

Sachin, Shahrukh, Lee, Akhtar, Symonds, Bhajji, Mallya, Ambani, Warne, Murli, Gilly, Veeru, Jaysurya all at one place. Fireworks are a must. Well not neccesarily. On the forefront it does seem it's the quality of players, teams and power of BCCI that made IPL a big success unlike ICL.

But if you go a little deep, you got to get impressed by the way IPL tournament was promoted and packaged. Was difficult to get this league thing accepted in India, after all which team a common man will support? He likes Sachin, but he likes Sehwag too, he likes Yuvraj but also Dhoni. The Biggest challenge!!! Get this format accepted. But How...how to sell it ??

But then came the ads and promos.

Bollywood !!! It does sell cricket. A specially designed catchy promo was the "Kab aayega ranjan aur manu ka baap?" It was a typical ad that promoted the tried and tested bollywood masala, twins, father missing, mother taunted and teased by society…and finally coming the "Aaa gaya manu-ranjan(implying manoranjan) ka baap…DLF IPL CUP".

It was not that cute little ad that everyone watches and forgets even the name of the product...it did give the desired effect, created the curiosity with words...'kab aayega …kab aayega...ranjan aur manu ka baap' and then flats it out with a very comic ending. People criticized that advertisement a lot but the important thing is they discussed and that was the idea. To make it a topic for tea time discussion.

After all which team will he support and on what basis, what logic. No country, no state, nothing to identify with. Then again came the ads for the rescue.

The dentist asking the patient "which team are u with " and poor patient not knowing the team of dentist replies innocently Delhi Daredevils and then in a low voice doctor reveals that he supports Kolkata Riders. Nurse suggesting doctor to get one tooth removed of the patient. "Ek kyon paanch daant nikaliye...kaafi daring aaadmi hai...daredevils"...was the punch line. Then came a series of promos which created a curiosity and a support for different teams and in turn the tournament.

Some lady blaming a guy of teasing just because he was a Mumbai Indian supporter and she a Bangalore Royal Challenger supporter, another place a boy not giving a place to an aged fellow just because boy is a Chennai Super King's supporter and the aged guy is wearing a band of Deccan Charger.

"Which team are you with...?" was the buzz word....who are you supporting...No logic was required. These ads were conveying the idea, forget the logic, pick any team with emotions and support with passion.

90 % of the reason why I am watching IPL is these ads only and rest is obviously cricket. But saying that ads alone made the tournament a big success is too big a statement to be made in a society that is not used to be called easily influenced specially by cheap ads and therefore I will leave it at that.

Till the society starts accepting facts, keep enjoying the front foot of daredevils and dhol of Punjabi kings XI. And yes don't forget asking "Which team are you with...?"

A musical love story

2008-05-01T19:25:00.004+08:00

Beauty by birth,
Sleekness by choice
She is a companion in deed
Who I always prize

She is intelligent a lot,
She is stubborn a tad
But she sings for me,
When I am in mood bad

She makes me speed high
With me on my motor bike
She companies me on my trips
As well on mountain hikes

She hums like a connoisseur,
On music of her like
But behaves cutely ignorant,
When the playlist is otherwise

Of all the musical gadgets
She will be my soprano
And I declare that my love
Is most for ipod nano
(And you thought otherwise)

To have her as a companion
Is an honour, love and fun
To lose her over something,
Would be a damage never undone
(Actually damage would be SGD 200)

A million dollars or knighthood

2008-05-01T00:27:00.003+08:00

Recently a friend of mine asked me a question, what would you choose between a million dollars or knighthood and why? He needed to answer the question for his application in one of the business school. His motives were altogether different from mine; however, the question got me thinking. This is what I came up with for an answer:

To be very honest my answer to this question has changed a couple of time since I first read the question. In retrospect when I analyze my thoughts I find that my answer has gone through four distinct stages to reach the final conclusion.

The first thought that crossed my mind after reading the question was, “Can’t I have both a million dollars and knighthood!”. I think that’s a typical self-indulgent answer, though if you look at it deeply, it has some traces of honesty to it. However, I cannot go with it since it would be silly to break the rule of choosing just one option. Isn’t it?

Having rejected my first answer, I started making choices as I always do. In this mode “a choice between a million dollars and the knighthood” was no different from other popular choices like Coke or Pepsi, physics or mathematics, Godfather the book or Godfather the movie. I chose a million dollar, and why? Probably, I like being rich more than being famous, or it’s just the first option I always go for, which is quite evident from my liking for Coke, physics and Godfather the book. Even so, I cannot go with this answer as it is completely based on my whim.

In search for more concrete logic, I did some research comparing numbers of millionaires and people with knighthood in the last decade, and found knighhood to be a rarer breed. While this is true, people with knighthood are already millionaires in almost all of the cases. This leaves me with only one logical choice of opting for knighthood.

Having decided on knighthood gave me a temporary satisfaction of supporting my choice with some solid research and logic. But, soon enough I realized that I still need to go with my first instinct, however, this time the prize (both million dollars and knighhood, or anything for that matter) has to be acquired with hard work and intelligent thinking. I know the answer is still self-indulgent (a bit boring also), but no more silly. Probably, the answer is based on my long time belief that it’s the journey that matters and not the destination.

Square root of 3

2008-04-30T00:05:00.008+08:00

Yesterday I watched the sequel to the hit comedy Harold and Kumar. I would like to share this interesting poem from the movie on irrational number-root three (√3). The poem, actually, weaves a crucial scene during the end of the movie. Internet sources claim that the poem was written by director’s high school classmate Dave Feinberg, who also happens to be an MIT alumnus. Anyway, you enjoy the poem!

I’m sure that I will always be

A lonely number like root three

The three is all that’s good and right,

Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,

I wish instead I were a nine

For nine could thwart this evil trick,

With just some quick arithmetic

I know I’ll never see the sun,

As one point seven three two one (1.7321)

Such is my reality,

A sad irrationality

When hark! What is this I see,

Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,

Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,

Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds

With the wave of magic wands

Our square root signs become unglued

Your love for me has been renewed

The follower

2008-04-29T18:29:00.002+08:00

This is the strangest way
Of your departure
I can not see
But sense you everywhere

Nothing can transform me
To match your prominence
In submission I destroyed
My own existence

Believing in you
I traveled so far
Moon is my abode now
And companion is a star

To become a preacher
Is not so wise
I became a follower and
This is my only choice

A blissful destruction

2008-04-28T16:54:00.003+08:00

Today is the day
Of my destruction
I am thinking about you
In my recollection

The sky has been
Celebrating for so long
It must have known
About my impending death-song

I am burning my house
For the light I can not see
I must be the most blissful soul
In the whole galactic sea

My new abode is
Just few steps away
But, I know, the distance
Will take an eternity of delay

Reality of a dream

2008-04-27T16:10:00.004+08:00

Last night I had a dream in my sleep
Or was it a thought, when I was awake?
Whatever it was, it was quite profound
Or was it again, one of my ideas fake?

Wondering about the reality of my thoughts
Questioning about the existence of my dream
I found myself in a state of trance
Or was it again, an intentional scheme?

The question I ask over and again
The doubts I cast in all my themes
Is there any control of self and will?
Or is it again, the being supreme?

An enigma

2008-04-26T16:24:00.006+08:00

The one that is in front
Is said to be the biggest odd
The one they never saw
Is said to be the greatest God

Life is said to be means
To a mysterious end
Some people call it an enigma
None can comprehend

Distance between hearts have moved
Beyond reconciliation
Why do they call men
Universe's greatest creation?

Few innocent flowers are still bleeding
In the holy garden
But then blood is necessary to restore
The earth and the heaven

What are POEMS, technically?

2008-04-25T17:50:00.005+08:00

This one is a bit technical, but not difficult. I posted this piece to create some awareness about MEMS and related fields, as I have been referring to them in my earlier posts. This is also a reason for my love for POEMS. How? You will see once you read this paragraph:

“Miniaturization of optical components and their integration with the existing micro-electro-mechanical system (MEMS) has emerged as a new discipline in the last 2 decades, and is progressively making its way towards commercialization in a number of fields. It offers significant possibilities for achieving the micro-opto-electro-mechanical system (MOEMS) functionality necessary to meet the performance needs of a number of emerging applications, such as, imaging, sensing, communications, and control. Realization of these applications requires the development of a set of microoptical components and processes suitable for integration with MEMS and supporting microelectronics. The resulting MEMS “optical toolbox” will provide the standard building blocks with which photonic functions can be achieved within MOEMS. However, the traditional materials used for MEMS fabrication (silicon and derived compounds) can not provide high quality optical components. Apparently much better results can be obtained by using polymers, which have shown promising results for the fabrication of converging lenses, creating a whole new field of polymer based miniaturised optical systems as polymer-opto-electro-mechnical systems or POEMS.”

The big question?

2008-04-24T11:13:00.004+08:00

I saw my own soul

Disappear in air thin
Suddenly I realized

Everyone is related to him

In an atmosphere

Of such honest purity
How do I measure

My own morality?

Who will decide

If I am the sinner?
There is no discrimination

Between failure and winner?

If that was the case

Then why did it all start?
That is the question

Raised by my curious heart

Still I love my school

2008-04-23T14:17:00.008+08:00

The poem is written in remembrance of my school. It has been almost 10 years of my parting, but I still feel nostalgic thinking about the fun we used to have throughout the school life. This one is for you my lovely school…

Nothing has changed

Nothing is lost
Everything is the same

As I would have thought

Bell still rings

Chapel still sings
Teacher still shouts

Students still have doubts

Buildings with the yellow-brown stripes

Are still found
Ever scolding gardener

Is still around

There is still that physics examination

Students most fear
There is still that playground

Students find most dear

Eating food before interval

Is still an unwritten pact
“Teacher, can I come in”

Is still considered inapt

Still there is punishment

For homework not done
Still we cherish

When teacher says well-done

The sweetest of sound

Is still the last period bell
Even after ten years

My heart prays for my school doing well

Kangaroo on the table

2008-04-22T20:31:00.003+08:00

Having seen Ankur’s adventure slash misadventure in my last post, I felt like sharing a misadventure of my own. Infact, I feel happy and a little stupid to share this incident with you. This is about my visit to an SPIE conference in Australia last December. As we all know that main attraction of an oversees conference is NOT THE CONFERENCE…but the word “OVERSEES” associated with it. Same applied to me.

Anyway, I was very excited about my maiden visit to Australia…Adelaide to be very precise…mostly because I wanted to see Kangaroos...LIVE... It was a 4 days event, and I wasn’t able to see a single Kangaroo for the first 3 days. On the last day we had a banquet …the most important activity of the conference….And I was about to see a Kangaroo…although I didn’t really realize it till the very last moment…Infact it was sitting (maybe lying) on my dinner table……You don’t believe me ?? Do you?

The dinner started with soup and …hold your breath… roasted KANGAROO…I didn’t eat it is another story. But it took me a while to understand that my first sight of a Kangaoroo was on my dinner table in the form of starters…However, I did manage to see a live one later.

So here is an advice to all those guys who are visiting Australia for the first time…please be ready to see a Kangaroo on your dinner table and otherwise.

And by the way the CONFERENCE WAS AWESOME!!!

A journey to remember

2008-04-22T18:49:00.008+08:00

This one is from one of my friend Ankur's dairy

A Cold night at Delhi in the end of November. Without any warm clothes and heart beat touching 100 so as the speed of the auto also. If it misses what else can I do..on the day it was the last one and none other for the day. I had to catch it if I plan to avoid the cold and reach in time to attend the marriage.

It was a train...at 10.30 pm I had to catch , my friend Ashraf waiting at the railway station near the train. Not for me...but for the train to leave...Thats what he was waiting for. May be even hoping that I never reach there. At least he will have some sleep. After all my resrvation was in the waiting list.What's there in MEMS and MAMS? Can't that be discussed any other time?

An hour back I was on a flight. My flight to Delhi was scheduled to land at 8.15 pm, but thanks to some wonderful planning by our Indian governments in giving licenses to so many private airlines and not constructing any airports, my poor plane was hovering over the Delhi airport for one hour for the lack of parking space.

Damn I could have pressed a space bar and created many spaces on my PC but on airport...things were not beneath my fingers...

"Hope it lands in time for me to catch the train". I prayed
Seeing my praying hands asked nearby passenger."Which train are u supposed to catch and from which station ?"
I ignored the first question and flatly answered the second as nizammuddin. "
Oh Nizaamuddin. ..that's 40 min from the airport terminal..max 1hr." bang came the reply.
Nervous enough to talk further and his replies not making things easier." thanks "I said...I thought that would close the matter.
But I was wrong he came again..." Had it been New Delhi it would take u about an hr and a half but Nizammuddin that's pretty near ".

What non sense...Can't you keep quiet I thought. Now I was looking for a delete button on my keyboard which could have deleted him from my adjoining seat. But as always I dint get any. My boss used to get them whenever he was going through my draft copies. I landed at 8.45pm. Another Hr and a half to go. I thought that was easy now..but then luggage came after a lifetime ….15 min ... looked a lifetime to me then....Well anyways I still had an hr and 15 min and if the adjoining irritating person in my flight is to be believed then I still had a lot of time.

Well Ashraf took on 50 min to cover the distance I had 75 min...So decided to go for a PRE-PAID taxi counter...paid some 120 bugs...but for another lifetime…15 min…could not catch any of the taxis...They were all very busy to run off strategically avoiding me...either taking the passenger next to me or before me...but always avoiding me as if they knew I m not going to pay them a penny more than I have already paid at the counter.

But at 9.30 I managed to outsmart one of them and entered and asked him to drive like anything to enable me to reach Nizammuddin. I considered to tell my driver what John Abraham told Nana patekar about the horse powers and speed's relation to the money and all but then decided against it.

Meanwhile I came to know from Ashraf that the train is on Platform No 11 the last one. I reached at 10.20 on the station...haah...Thank god…I made it ten minutes early...gave a tip to the taxi driver for driving fast...confident enough and thanking god for listening to my prayers... Climbed up and enquired about the platform no 11 and lo... there were only 7 platforms. How come? Called Ashraf again

"Which platform did u tell...?"
"11 yaar..Last one ...and the last bogie for that matter..so make it fast" Again some one's reply not making life easier for me..

I checked the ticket and lo...the train was scheduled to depart from New delhi and not from Nizammuddin.!!!!

I stood there on Nizammuddin speechless staring at the big board over the station which read "Welcome to Hazrat Nizammuddin Railway Station ".

The other way round

2008-04-22T17:49:00.005+08:00

To touch somebody’s heart

Is a great virtue
To let your heart get touched

Is a greater pursuit

To feel somebody’s pain

Is extremely considerate
To have somebody feel your pain

Is what I await

To realize your dream

Is hard work and determination
To help somebody realize his dream

Is real fascination

To have a friend

Is highly valuable
To be somebody’s friend

Is absolutely invaluable

To love someone

Is fortunate enough
To get loved in return

Is exceptional luck

To die for somebody

Is a big sacrifice
To have somebody to die for you

Is the real prize

To have your way

Is no doubt tough
To have the other way round

Is legendry stuff

The overrated simplification

2008-04-21T13:02:00.009+08:00

Few things should never be

Explained in easy words
Simplification is my

Idea of being absurd

I may try hard to be explicit

For being convenient
But explanation is not so appealing

Unless incoherent

Clarity of thoughts

Is an idea overrated
Opinions look so monotonous

Unless debated

Let there be inconspicuous thoughts

All around
Let there be corners

In a round

As they say,

“There are two facets to a coin”
I am eager to know the third side

That was never found

A global student

2008-04-19T14:12:00.010+08:00

The first time I heard the word globalization was when I started reading newspapers… especially business section…on some friend’s recommendation during my high school days…I don’t remember the names of either of them, and YES I am old enough to remember my high school days...He or she…let there be a little confusion…had given me a worldly advice to be at least literate in commercial aspect of the global market this planet is fast becoming. From then onwards the term globalization has been bothering me in some form or other…Not that I am complaining.

Hang a bit guys...I didn’t start this piece to tell you about my high school crushes or misadventures…both literally and figuratively…Although that will make an equally boring write-up, but that’s not the point here. The motivation here is to share an interesting example about globalization in context of my life…or rather a research student’s life…Being an Indian studying in Singaporean University was not enough of unusual combination that I found a French supervisor…a very good one for that matter… with a Chinese wife…I know I am getting a bit personal …Now, what do you call me if not the great global student (not a student anymore )? …Great is for effect here, so don’t take it seriously…The question is also rhetorical so please don’t bother to answer it…You may ponder about it if you like and relate it with your own experiences as a researcher in a foreign (but friendly) land.

While this is true, the lab…the biggest lab in the department by the way…HURRAY… where I work has almost 18 researchers…there are many more who uses our wonderful facility but they don’t sit with us…Out of 18 researchers, 5 are Singaporean, 4 are Chinese, 3 are Indian, 2 are SPR, and 1 each from Thailand, Iran, Romania and Myanmar…a pretty good balance of nationalities covering regions as diverse as Asia Pacific, Indian Subcontinent, Middle East and even Europe …and for the record we have got a good camaraderie among us…Jokes apart, but the examples clearly demonstrates an important point here. The point about the inter-dependency of research globally, and that the idea of a global student is no more a local one. Doesn’t it tell us something about these catchy phrases, like, unity in diversity; cultural vibrancy; world as a global village; globalization, et al…of course in research context?

Note: Don’t confuse inter-dependency of research with multi-disciplinary research, about which I will talk later…Ever heard of MEMS? No? Nevermind!

The contradictions

2008-04-18T18:36:00.012+08:00

Is it possible to believe in something absolutely?
And still fail to live upto it in entirety!
Is it possible to love someone with total heart?
And still the idea of unconditional love drifts you apart!

Is it possible to lead a group with courage and deed?
And still fail to make a call when it is in need!
Is it possible to win a trivial argument and an important war?
And still leave the conquered without a single scar!

Is it possible to look someone in total admiration?
And still desire to find a weakness for accusation!
Is it possible to donate your entire possessions incognito?
And still hoping for the moment when somebody would know!

Is it possible to completely submit yourself for a cause?
And still doubt the righteousness of heavenly laws!

Is it possible to believe in the ultimate reality-the death?
And still fail to consider the truth until your last breath!